Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Brownies (Trader Joe’s)

I do this for you. All of you gluten-free junkies and freaks have a friend in the business. I could go out there and fuel up on delicious wheat filled products and stuff myself full of pastry as you drool at my screen wishing you could enjoy it as much as I did. Alas, you cannot and the food industry makes feeble attempts at re-creating dishes normally packed with gluten to cater to your needs. These wheat free concoctions have about a 20% success ratio, and if a restaurant had this rate of failure, there’s no way that I would ever go back. But, again, I do this for you. When I picked up Trader Joe’s Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Brownies I knew exactly the chance I was taking, and if the tone of this blog has steered you anywhere. You know exactly how this went:

First off, I toyed with the idea of picking these up. The price tag wasn’t astronomical, but for two brownies it was a little steep. Then I thought about the fact that you could probably throw chocolate into just about anything and I would like it enough to justify paying that much for 2 brownies. So, I took it home and ripped open the first of the two individually wrapped brownies. I set it on a plate and warmed it up in the microwave for about 20 seconds. These instructions aren’t on the packaging, so don’t go looking for them. This is just how I prefer my brownies. I took the chocolate chip square out, and snagged my first bite. It crumbled in my hand. I grabbed the biggest piece that I could and popped it into my mouth. The dry bits on the outside flaked in my mouth like bits of chocolate flavored chalk. Moisture followed, but it wasn’t the thick velvety texture that I was used to out of a brownie. But, this wasn’t really a brownie. It was fake attempt at one, and failed.

I’d leave this one on the shelf. There are plenty of other gluten-free goodies to choose from, and unfortunately this one is among the 80% of wheat-less items that fail miserably. There are just some things that aren’t meant to be gluten-free. Brownies aren’t one of them. So, FORK the fool who tries to push one off on me.

Kirkwood Gluten Free Chicken Nuggets (ALDI)

Got kids with a gluten allergy and an incredibly picky disposition towards food that’s only brown?   I’ve met those kids and shopping for them cannot be easy, as just about everything brown is that color because of the wheat breading that coats it.  Just a few years ago, this would have brought you to the edge of insanity.  You’d struggle to find anything your kid would eat that didn’t contain wheat and usually fail miserably.  Things are different and doctors are diagnosing celiac disease with more frequency, forcing the food industry to start adjusting to this new large market of wheat intolerant consumers.  So, on my last visit to ALDI, I spotted some gluten free chicken nuggets.  I was curious to see how they differed from the gluten packed version, and threw them into my basket to try them out for my gluten free readers.

Handling the bag, I could tell that these were a little smaller than most chicken nuggets.  I scanned the bag and discovered that I had just paid $4.99 for 16 oz. of chicken nuggets.  Not exactly a steal.  I’ve seen 29 oz of regular nuggets for the same price.  I guess that gluten free/all natural label adds a little extra to the price tag.  The ingredient list is quite small and upon further review, lactose free as well.

With the packaging thoroughly read, I was ready to taste.  I set the oven for 375 and placed 2.5 servings of the machine processed chicken nuggets onto a baking sheet.  They sat in the oven for about 15 minutes until crispy on the outside.  As I was picking them off of the sheet, I realized that they were quite spongy, and not very dense.  15 nuggets made their way onto a plate with a side of my favorite condiment, mustard.  I grabbed the first bite sized nugget and bypassed the mustard, seeing how they were on their own.  They were light and fluffy, with a bit of a crispy texture from the rice flour breading.  There was hardly any flavor and made me feel as if I was eating a chicken flavored sponge.  They weren’t that good, and epitomized what has tortured the gluten free industry for so long.  However, I could see kids enjoying these, as they drown them in bbq sauce and ketchup.

Sometimes I’m surprised by gluten free items.  Not this time.  This was exactly what I should have expected.  Overall, these aren’t good, and the value isn’t really there either.  With so many options out there these days for those who have to go gluten free, it makes these nuggets feel like a big FORK U to consumers.  It looks like I’ll have half a bag of these spongy, deep fried nuggets in the freezer for a while.  Anyone want some free food?